Sexual Abuse: who is to blame?

Sexual abuse needs to be addressed everywhere cos it's done more harm to the female child.  In the news,  it's either a 70 year old man rape a 15 year old girl  or a corper impregnate a 13 year old female child. 

Feature Post: The Fear Of Being Single

I've be wanting to pen down my thoughts on the Fear of being single for a while now, I just couldn't find the right time, right mood and right frame of mind. Until today...Until This very Minute... Wondering what triggered the thoughts... And then I realized am actually living my fears right now..

Entrepreneurs Corner : What You Need To start A Business.

Just this morning I thought of starting something new on my blog.  I had to think of giving it a general title as "entrepreneur's corner". 
Today, we're talking about how to start a business.  With the situation of the economy and the high rate of unemployment in the country,  I won't advise you to sit back,  relax,  send CVs,  attend interviews and chill for your " congratulatory letter " from the firm. 

Repost:LIFE'S VICISSITUDES AND THE VERITY OF VICTORY

Not everything goes according to plan. We cannot always control what happens, but we can learn to accept victories and defeats and use them to move forward.

Social Media Craze(Series 4)

So,  this platform  is a photo/video sharing  app  .....
Instagram seems to be one of the top social media platform where you find people there for different purpose.  Some are there to upgrade their business audience and of course get clients by showcasing their products or business ,  while some are just there to set P(do I need to explain what setting P means?.) , some are also there to show off. .... Oops!  I need not explain all.  So from my own point of view, below are the different categories of people on Instagram. 

Questions That Turns Me off on a First Date

We tend to meet people everyday either coincidentally or anyhow you can tag it ....  There's this syndrome of first date (meeting the person ) .
Meeting people through this first date / chat determines your interest on how you really want the relationship to be.  Personally,  if I don't get to like you on a first date/

The Beauty of Being an Enterpreneur: Pains & Gains

Being an entrepreneur is not a day's business neither is it rice and beans.  It's something you envision,  imagine and work hard to ensure it turns real. 
I'll try to make this post so real in the best way I can,  especially through the  experience I've encountered so far. 

Common Lies People Tell

I don't think I need to start giving a detailed explanation on what a lie is.  The only part I don't get is where people try to create a different perspective to lie.....
I go all "side eyed" when someone is tryna create the impression of there's white and black lie.  Ehn!  If I hear,  Lie na lie and nothing can change the fact.  In fact all route leads to he'll if you tell a blue,  white,  pink lie.
But let's face reality,  some people get to this particular point or do I call it crossroad where they actually feel the best thing they can do is lie just to avoid the other party from getting angry,  or to please that person.  Truth is,  it doesn't work all the time.  
The part that I really can't accept  is give an obvious lie in public.  Give an obvious lie by telling me you're in front of Unilag gate while I'm waiting for you at the gate meanwhile you're either in that Yaba bus stuck in traffic.   Some people na boss for this aspect.  OK!.... So what are the common kinda lies I've heard so far.... 
1. I'm at Yaba when you know that you're actually in that Lekki transit bus to obalende.  Ah!  Some people are wicked o.  Some will even tell you,  "there's traffic in Yaba,  it's so bad that I might have to board bike" .  Just this question please,  will the person kill you if you are actually sincere that you're on your way to obscene? . 

2. The network is bad..... I'm guilty of this though.... Some people do this for so many reasons,  either to avoid a conversation or claim they dialled your line and the network provider said your number wasn't reachable..... Although our naija network providers could be funny but some lies are just so obviously told.  Take it  or  leave it. I actually do it for 2 reasons,  either I'm not in the mood to talk and a random talkative friend calls or when you start asking me questions that I either don't have an answer for that question or I'm not willing to answer .  I end the call with full hopes that the conversation will at least be cut short and it works.  Lool

3. I changed my line,  thus I lost my contact, yours inclusive : people do that a lot..... I easily know if someone doesn't have my contact or not..... The first response I hear depicts that a lot..... Personally,  I'm  very lazy in odd ways.... Lazy when it comes to saving numbers..... Maybe cos I procastinate  when it comes to that. 

4. Hello!  Hello!  Can you hear me? :this 4th point is actually coming from me or perhaps the general  ladylike mentality..... I totally dislike chokers...... I prefer the choker beads to  human beings who derive pleasure in choking me up.  Actually,  I can hear you but I just don't know how to politely tell you that I'm not interested in your talk. So?

5. The traffic Is terrible : we all know that pinky is to brain as lagos is to traffic.... The gods of traffic in lagos just have a way of doing things on the road,  funny part is when some people get surprised that "ehn!  At this time,  there's no traffic at this location.  Kilo shele (what happened) "..... But then a lot of people just find pleasure in hiding under the claws of traffic.....

I'm not tryna sound perfect though but it's better you say " I'm on my way or closeby " instead of using traffic as a cover up.  It doesn't work out fine all the time.  

So what are the common lies you know or you've been told that were not mentioned in the  aforementioned points  above..... I'll love to hear yours.  Kindly share them with me in the comment box.  

Questions I Don't Want To Be asked In 2016

Hiya!
It's some hours to the new year and I'm just too excited cos I'm thankful for the past 365 days so far. 
I'm sure you have a lot to be thankful to God for.  The fact that you're alive,  hale and hearty is one major reason why you should be.
So you see,  there are some kinda questions some people ask and in your head, you'll  be like "how do I answer this person? " it's better you don't even ask me at all..... In fact,  I just don't want be asked those kinda embarrassing questions in 2016...... Questions like :
1. How is school? : ahmean!  I wrote my final exams in UNILAG since December 2014,started my NYSC in April 2015, do you wish me well at all?....  Most times I don't answer these people who ask me such question but in 2016, if you should ask me "how is school ".  Ah! ,  E nor go funny o.

2. No share From the allowee? : for Christ sake I earn 19thousand, 8 hundred naira.  I choose not to write it in digits so most of y'all don't mistake it for one hundred and ninty eight thousand naira.  Ahmean!  It's not fair.  Bank deducts 200 naira from 19k8 monthly,  how much do I have to survive on? 

3.  When will you get married?.: some  primitive naija minded people assume that when you're through with school and  NYSC..... The next thing for you to plan or think of is to get married. 
Worst of all is when you attend a friend's wedding where most of the older guests  knows you. Ah!  It af be for you. 
Ahahn!  Wattapun!  Please Let God's will be done o.  Biko..... LET God's will be done.  Thank you. 

4. So what next after NYSC? : thank you,  I appreciate your concern..... In fact,  that's a very thoughtful question but please don't ask me if  you don't have a job for me,  dont ask me if you want to hold on to my plans after nysc and watch if I'll make a flaw,  don't ask me if you're not my relative/ mentor/close pal.  Please,  just don't ask me.  Instead ask God.

Any other question?  Have people choked you up with  too many embarrassing questions this year?. Please share them with me in the comment box. 

See you next year darling.
xxx

Lessons 2015 Has Taught Me

It's 5 days countdown to the new year already .  I feel I'm growing older already cos instead if feeling too excited about the new year,  I give myself this  quick flashback on how the outgoing year has been for me. 

It's Christmas Baby

Merry Christmas to you all.  I'm glad we are alive to witness another year of celebrating Christ.
Remember that he is the reason for the season,  that's enough reason for the celebration to be Christlike.
Do have a funfilled day.
A big thanks to my dearest readers, you all are the merry in my Christmas(I can't wait to post lessons 2015 has taught me and I believe 2016 is gon be a lit year for us

) .
I still remain your girl,  Debra.
#kisses

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Let It Out

Call me paranoid but issues like this get to me. Arim calls me heartless for leaving him. After her various pleas asking me to endure,I couldn't. He ripped what I have left called a heart with the stench of that ache. Even if I was going to endure,for how long? Call it trivial but just like rudiments, they make the soup of this relationship taste better. I have

managed to pull through this relationship coated with lies but that ache - oh that ache- broke the camel's back. First it was Iyef,the replacement he got when we had an argument. After three hours of screaming and heated arguments,his joystick needed soothing so he got her. A cleaner he met coincidentally at the cinema where we just had a fight was picked up to clean up the debris of our situationship. Sounds more like she puked over the relationship because things grew really ugly afterwards. Iyef after that night became his friend,how do u explain that? Arim,I endured that,but not this.
    My only escape route in this argument is to remain on the phone; ping someone,poke Ada,tweet at Ejiro,Tag Tola,just remain on the phone else that ache's stench will hit you like a punch in the face. It wouldn't leave you just bleeding,it would also wipe your memory. Gunse has chosen not to understand and I've been trying my best to tone down the 'bluntness'. Gunse is always upset whenever I'm on the phone. He claims it's rude but every girl knows that its an escape route that saves lives. Whenever his gist and jokes are dry,or he's really bad looking, pick your phone and keep texting. He'd shut up and focus. It does the trick all the time except with Gunse. The phone triggers the verbosity in him and worsens the situation. I noticed the sour taste when I kissed him goodnight,some days back. I ignored,hoping that it should come from the previous meal. Truth be told,Gunse kept dropping hints which probably sent the 'stay away' signal but I kept creating excuses for him. A break could have saved us,but NO,we kept pushing. The other day,we went to this great restaurant, after a scrumptious meal,Gunse began to suck his teeth. Initially I thought it was a reaction out of disgust for something,but it wasn't. He was digging deep trying to get this particle out of his teeth. Aina,you saw this and still made excuses. This went on for a week and I kept my calm until this fateful day. He decides to take Rachael to the movies and home afterwards without my knowledge. At the box office,he stares at me as if he had seen a ghost. I was here with my cousin to see this same movie. I ignore him and greet this heavily painted almost naked aunt by his side. I decide to go hone with my cousin after the movie,in peace,but he decides to have a conversation that day. The first statement came out with that spoilt egg mixed with soured egusi sort of smell. Till this moment,I can't remember what he said. All I found myself doing was reaching out for my phone. 
             "Aina,I'm talking and you are still texting..."
I wish I could ask him what that smell was,but I couldn't find the courage to. At one instance when I complained about the smell,he claims he visited the dentist. From that moment,the feigned sweetness stopped. I'm still texting and he begins his unconscious confession;
               "Why won't I go out with Rachael when you are always on the phone?
                Who are you texting when I'm seated here...
                Only God knows if you have been faithful...
" Faithful" was the last thing I remember he said before my outburst;
                 " I have held this for too long
           I can't take it anymore
           I could handle the lies,if they were mimed
           And not spoken from your mouth
           Cos anytime your jaw moves,I become scared
           Pls visit the dentist if you ever want to see me..."
I walked out,shut the door of his car,and life.

Sonia is a student of English, University of Lagos. She loves reading,movies and hanging out with friends. She enjoys scribbling(as she doesn't look at her works as real writings). She could be reached on Chicutie2009@yahoo.com.

Social Media Craze (Series 3 )

I signed up on this platform a year ago or there about and I wasn't so active on it.  Recently,  I just see myself active on the platform cos since I signed up on LinkedIn,  I've been less active.
Do I like LinkedIn?.  No!  I don't like it.  Gosh!  I love LinkedIn..... Maybe cos I've got one of the best connects tho.  LOL.  But seriously,  no hype about LinkedIn .  I love it.  Less show off..... I mean,  no show off.... Jes business minded people sharing posts/ pictures related to whatever is of great/good value to them and of course,  their connects. No silly updates like "chilling in hell'egusi" (Eeeer!  sorry!  I meant elegushi) or "steaming in my jacuzzi"
I love LinkedIn for the fact that:
1. You snoop around,  you're caught: Let me just give you this Lil advice for free.  It's not the best place to stalk on someone.  LOL.  I'm a real G when it comes to stalking..... I got an A grade in stalking without formal education/training.  Loool.  Jokes aside,  you get notified of everything on LinkedIn..... Everything about your connect.....latest updates / info which is  also of great/Lil relevance to either you or your connect. 

2. No Dramas: believe me when I say "No dramas".  Iono if it has to do with the kinda connect one has tho but I've not seen raunchy or illicit pictures of books, car selfie or some jagbajantis stylestyle showoff.  Naah! Haven't and I don't wanna have all that drama on that platform.

3. Everyone's a professional : I've been on LinkedIn with my profile as "a student at University of Lagos "  and then,  this friend of mine called me and jamisi that "ahahn,  Deborah this blog you've taken as part time unstable  job,  you can't even tag yourself as a blogger on a well recognised platform like linkedin. "
With all what she said.... I realized I had to change my profile(I'm lazy when it comes to editing profiles on these platforms .... Does the world care to know bou me through that?. ) .  I feel this is the part LinkedIn makes you categorise your job in a well professionalized manner..... In other ways making it seem posh..  If you're an eleran,  just rephrase it in a posh way..... More like "an expert in butchery".  Duuuh! 

4. No followers, just connects : I'm tired of the follow follow syndrome on some social media platforms.... I jes pray some people don't follow their followers to hell one day #jessayin tho....  Regardless of the fact that you tend to follow some people and they choose not to follow you.  LinkedIn has created the platform in a better way to connect with people of same business platform (or whichever way you term it) with you so you could at least interact better.  I've communicated with few people through LinkedIn (one of which I suspected faked his profile cos I did a follow up on Google.  Trust me I'd pass as an FBI agent  .  Lool).
Conclusively, I'd say LinkedIn is the one of the very best platform  to be.... Less dramas,  no showoffs and for the Android users,  the best way to use your megabyte and gain something (at least vacancy).

Are you on LinkedIn? ..... If you think we need to connect,  my name still remains Deborah Odeniran  :)

Social Media Craze (Series 2)

You're about  to read the next series of "social media craze" and this post is written by amaka.  Gosh!  Her intro on how she signed up on Twitter made me LOL. 
Once upon a time, if you didn't have a Facebook account, you weren't cool. The coolest kids on the block were those who had a Facebook account. Then came a new sensation.  Well! , not like it was new per say but we just had the epiphany and it was called Twitter.

I joined Twitter one fateful Sunday in 2011 after years of displaying stupidity and childishness on Facebook (yea, 2009-2011 was my year of  uploading silly posts  on Facebook) and since there was an unspoken deal that Facebook was for childish people while Twitter was for the mature minds (maybe Deb should talk about this discrimination about which social network is for kids and which is for adults .  LOL), I decided to port so as to join the clique of the  happening bae.
On this day,  while my family was preparing for Sunday service, I was in my room trying to crack the Twitter code (it took time for me to understand how it works) and immediately I figured it out, I followed my friends from the list I had compiled and begged for them to follow me back. It was a big deal o.  The follow back syndrome. 

I was so engrossed that my dad didn't even notice I was missing and so he locked me inside the house and proceeded to church with the rest of the family.
When I discovered what happened, I took my dress off, stretched on the bed and started tweeting away. By Friday of that week, I was baptised into the follow Friday ritual.

Follow/Exclusive Friday Shoutouts
Follow Friday happens on Fridays and here is how it works. There are some folks on Twitter, Twitter Lords, people whose Kingdom is Twitter and whose subjects are the attention whores seeking for validation from the number of followers they have or the number of tweets the have shared, mind you, there are so many Lords, each dominating the niche they carved for themselves and so, depending on how the spirit leads, you can beg them to give you a shout out with the aim of gaining followers or cajoling or even being aggressive out rightly and sometimes I wonder if the amount of Twitter followers one has will translate to cash. What pisses me off is the "follow back or I unfollow" line. Duuh!! Who you be??

There were days when Twitter will be thrown into a frenzy over some bloodcat list... The list could range from the happening babes on Twitter to out rightly foolish things and I keep asking myself how many of the humans of Twitter struggle to have their names written in the ultimate list of life.

So addicted to twitter was I that my phone once fell into the pot of stew I was cooking because I was multitasking.

Kindly Follow Back
As if the list isn't absurd enough, I hear people buy followers and I'm like wooowu... Well, they say it's good for promoting brands but hey, if you like, buy all the followers.  If I don't key into your idea, OYO is your surname oh. The funny part of it is when some people just tweet at you to follow them back even when they aren't following.  That's where Lil fights spring up on Twitter. 

Direct Messages Shenanigans
The DMs, yea, the direct message is another feature that tweeps use for private chats but mostly, they end up setting P(that's what they call hitting on a lady). Recently, I was going through my inbox and I was just laughing out at the stupid pick up lines guys have dropped over the years, pick up lines that are to me, dead on arrival. Truth is, I hardly reply those messages to avoid "see finish" because I've seen tweeps who were in a cordial relationship turned sour share leaked DMs on their time line while the jobless vultures who are ready to feast on them hover around.

Tweetfight
I almost forgot about twitfight.  Just as bad news go viral,  same way twitfight goes viral.  The first second you're seeing it on Twitter,  the next second,  Linda ikeji has saved you off the stress of searching for the next twitfight and then the next minute,  everyone airs their opinion on Twitter.  Twitter is a community where every Tom,  Dick and Harry has something to say. 

Connect
Bad as it is, I've met some nice people outside Twitter albeit accidentally like the shock I got when a lady walked up to me in NYSC camp and was like are you not @xyz on twitter??.. So while I'm not a sucker for online friendship, some people have become family to me.

Complaints
Asides the razzmatazz, twitter is a good avenue to network, make complaints, get traffic reports, get breaking news and so on.
After months of unnecessary deduction from deb's airtel sim and futile efforts from the customer care centre.  Deb's got everything rectified on Twitter after she aired out her mind via this platform. 

Profile
One more thing, your twitter profile should be professional except you are using an anonymous account, then can you use #sexy, #followforfollow #teamchelsea.. That is so juvenile and just so you know, employers now check out potential employees profiles online.

On a final note, change they say is constant and there has been a paradigm shift in which social network the "who is who" is on but if there is one social network that this change hasn't affected and won't affect, it's the 10th planet called Twitter with it's endless drama.

A big thanks to Amaka for taking her time to create this post.  You could connect to us via Twitter. 

Amaka's handle is @hundeyin1
Debra's handle is @debra_olamide

Is there something missing in the above points about this twitter drama and all? .  Let me have your thoughts in the comment box.