Wednesday, 23 December 2015

Let It Out

Call me paranoid but issues like this get to me. Arim calls me heartless for leaving him. After her various pleas asking me to endure,I couldn't. He ripped what I have left called a heart with the stench of that ache. Even if I was going to endure,for how long? Call it trivial but just like rudiments, they make the soup of this relationship taste better. I have
managed to pull through this relationship coated with lies but that ache - oh that ache- broke the camel's back. First it was Iyef,the replacement he got when we had an argument. After three hours of screaming and heated arguments,his joystick needed soothing so he got her. A cleaner he met coincidentally at the cinema where we just had a fight was picked up to clean up the debris of our situationship. Sounds more like she puked over the relationship because things grew really ugly afterwards. Iyef after that night became his friend,how do u explain that? Arim,I endured that,but not this.
    My only escape route in this argument is to remain on the phone; ping someone,poke Ada,tweet at Ejiro,Tag Tola,just remain on the phone else that ache's stench will hit you like a punch in the face. It wouldn't leave you just bleeding,it would also wipe your memory. Gunse has chosen not to understand and I've been trying my best to tone down the 'bluntness'. Gunse is always upset whenever I'm on the phone. He claims it's rude but every girl knows that its an escape route that saves lives. Whenever his gist and jokes are dry,or he's really bad looking, pick your phone and keep texting. He'd shut up and focus. It does the trick all the time except with Gunse. The phone triggers the verbosity in him and worsens the situation. I noticed the sour taste when I kissed him goodnight,some days back. I ignored,hoping that it should come from the previous meal. Truth be told,Gunse kept dropping hints which probably sent the 'stay away' signal but I kept creating excuses for him. A break could have saved us,but NO,we kept pushing. The other day,we went to this great restaurant, after a scrumptious meal,Gunse began to suck his teeth. Initially I thought it was a reaction out of disgust for something,but it wasn't. He was digging deep trying to get this particle out of his teeth. Aina,you saw this and still made excuses. This went on for a week and I kept my calm until this fateful day. He decides to take Rachael to the movies and home afterwards without my knowledge. At the box office,he stares at me as if he had seen a ghost. I was here with my cousin to see this same movie. I ignore him and greet this heavily painted almost naked aunt by his side. I decide to go hone with my cousin after the movie,in peace,but he decides to have a conversation that day. The first statement came out with that spoilt egg mixed with soured egusi sort of smell. Till this moment,I can't remember what he said. All I found myself doing was reaching out for my phone. 
             "Aina,I'm talking and you are still texting..."
I wish I could ask him what that smell was,but I couldn't find the courage to. At one instance when I complained about the smell,he claims he visited the dentist. From that moment,the feigned sweetness stopped. I'm still texting and he begins his unconscious confession;
               "Why won't I go out with Rachael when you are always on the phone?
                Who are you texting when I'm seated here...
                Only God knows if you have been faithful...
" Faithful" was the last thing I remember he said before my outburst;
                 " I have held this for too long
           I can't take it anymore
           I could handle the lies,if they were mimed
           And not spoken from your mouth
           Cos anytime your jaw moves,I become scared
           Pls visit the dentist if you ever want to see me..."
I walked out,shut the door of his car,and life.

Sonia is a student of English, University of Lagos. She loves reading,movies and hanging out with friends. She enjoys scribbling(as she doesn't look at her works as real writings). She could be reached on