Saturday, 30 April 2016

Sexual Abuse: who is to blame?

Sexual abuse needs to be addressed everywhere cos it's done more harm to the female child.  In the news,  it's either a 70 year old man rape a 15 year old girl  or a corper impregnate a 13 year old female child. 
It doesn't leave a positive impact on the victim instead all it does is scar this victim till she's able to stand strong,  learn from her past life and pass a message across to the Next generation. 
During my service year,  I heard of two incidents where corpers molested underage children (didn't get the first hand information anyways). 
While my local government inspector was passing this information across,  he advised corpers to stop "frolicking underage children ".  It's saddening to realize that one who's went through formal education for years,  who's not a non-literate,  who thinks he's man enough can actually do this to a young girl,  have they tried to put their sibling / niece in that girls state? . 
While the local government inspector  was giving us a brief detail on how it happened,  how the guy was caught, beaten black and blue,  then I heard a voice from behind saying "na the girl fault ".  Really?
Only for me to turn and realize it was a lady.  Gosh!  Which generation is ours for christ sake?  How will you say it's the fault of a naive 13 year old girl to be molested?
From my point of view,  This girl :
* is naive
* can be easily pressured
* could have been threatened by the guy
* might probably see no wrong in what she's doing
I never bothered arguing with the girl cos from her response I knew she needed divine intervention and a Little orientation.
Back to the main gist,  I think a child might not be molested easily if she has a close relationship with her mom.  Mothers should learn to orient their kids from tender age.  Tell them that their private part shouldn't be touched by uncles or brothers or any guy,  even dad. 
Mothers should allow their daughters feel free with them.  Ask her how her activities in school was,  did any boy harass her?  Did the teacher do anything?  If these conversations comes up repeatedly daily,  you don't even need to ask her before she'll open up cos she knows "mom is gonna ask me how my day was in school"
Mother's should orient her daughter on the various parts of the body.  It's her body,  she should know more from you before that uncle teaches her more than you expect.
Parents should avoid accommodating strangers "especially males" or allow them get closer to their daughters.  I find it hard having a close relationship with just anyone, let alone a stranger.
A close look should be taken on her private tutor if he's a male.  Remember she's a kid,  she could be threatened and feel scared to even tell her mom who she's close to.
What's your take on this?  Who's is to blame?
Personally,  I'll blame the guy and the mother.  Why?
This is a young girl who knows nothing. 
The guy is a selfish guy who just wants to be sexual satisfied
What I think is wrong with the guy? .
The guy needs to visit a spiritual pastor.  He has issues with his life
The guy is either unattractive,  dirty,  got no class and he feels "it's easier for me to get a small girl to make me feel alright"
Have a lovely weekend

1 comment:

  1. I blogged about this some months back... We need to orientate our children, male and female because I know a lodge mate who was having sex with the boys in our PPA.
    The problem is the way our parents were taught that sex is dirty and should be talked about in a hush tone, aside from the way the female is disadvantaged in Africa.
    Teach them there's nothing like just the tip, teach them that a boy touching you won't get you pregnant and other misconceptions.