You're about to read the next series of "social media craze" and this post is written by amaka. Gosh! Her intro on how she signed up on Twitter made me LOL.
Once upon a time, if you didn't have a Facebook account, you weren't cool. The coolest kids on the block were those who had a Facebook account. Then came a new sensation. Well! , not like it was new per say but we just had the epiphany and it was called Twitter.
I joined Twitter one fateful Sunday in 2011 after years of displaying stupidity and childishness on Facebook (yea, 2009-2011 was my year of uploading silly posts on Facebook) and since there was an unspoken deal that Facebook was for childish people while Twitter was for the mature minds (maybe Deb should talk about this discrimination about which social network is for kids and which is for adults . LOL), I decided to port so as to join the clique of the happening bae.
On this day, while my family was preparing for Sunday service, I was in my room trying to crack the Twitter code (it took time for me to understand how it works) and immediately I figured it out, I followed my friends from the list I had compiled and begged for them to follow me back. It was a big deal o. The follow back syndrome.
I was so engrossed that my dad didn't even notice I was missing and so he locked me inside the house and proceeded to church with the rest of the family.
When I discovered what happened, I took my dress off, stretched on the bed and started tweeting away. By Friday of that week, I was baptised into the follow Friday ritual.
Follow/Exclusive Friday Shoutouts
Follow Friday happens on Fridays and here is how it works. There are some folks on Twitter, Twitter Lords, people whose Kingdom is Twitter and whose subjects are the attention whores seeking for validation from the number of followers they have or the number of tweets the have shared, mind you, there are so many Lords, each dominating the niche they carved for themselves and so, depending on how the spirit leads, you can beg them to give you a shout out with the aim of gaining followers or cajoling or even being aggressive out rightly and sometimes I wonder if the amount of Twitter followers one has will translate to cash. What pisses me off is the "follow back or I unfollow" line. Duuh!! Who you be??
There were days when Twitter will be thrown into a frenzy over some bloodcat list... The list could range from the happening babes on Twitter to out rightly foolish things and I keep asking myself how many of the humans of Twitter struggle to have their names written in the ultimate list of life.
So addicted to twitter was I that my phone once fell into the pot of stew I was cooking because I was multitasking.
Kindly Follow Back
As if the list isn't absurd enough, I hear people buy followers and I'm like wooowu... Well, they say it's good for promoting brands but hey, if you like, buy all the followers. If I don't key into your idea, OYO is your surname oh. The funny part of it is when some people just tweet at you to follow them back even when they aren't following. That's where Lil fights spring up on Twitter.
Direct Messages Shenanigans
The DMs, yea, the direct message is another feature that tweeps use for private chats but mostly, they end up setting P(that's what they call hitting on a lady). Recently, I was going through my inbox and I was just laughing out at the stupid pick up lines guys have dropped over the years, pick up lines that are to me, dead on arrival. Truth is, I hardly reply those messages to avoid "see finish" because I've seen tweeps who were in a cordial relationship turned sour share leaked DMs on their time line while the jobless vultures who are ready to feast on them hover around.
I almost forgot about twitfight. Just as bad news go viral, same way twitfight goes viral. The first second you're seeing it on Twitter, the next second, Linda ikeji has saved you off the stress of searching for the next twitfight and then the next minute, everyone airs their opinion on Twitter. Twitter is a community where every Tom, Dick and Harry has something to say.
Bad as it is, I've met some nice people outside Twitter albeit accidentally like the shock I got when a lady walked up to me in NYSC camp and was like are you not @xyz on twitter??.. So while I'm not a sucker for online friendship, some people have become family to me.
Asides the razzmatazz, twitter is a good avenue to network, make complaints, get traffic reports, get breaking news and so on.
After months of unnecessary deduction from deb's airtel sim and futile efforts from the customer care centre. Deb's got everything rectified on Twitter after she aired out her mind via this platform.
One more thing, your twitter profile should be professional except you are using an anonymous account, then can you use #sexy, #followforfollow #teamchelsea.. That is so juvenile and just so you know, employers now check out potential employees profiles online.
On a final note, change they say is constant and there has been a paradigm shift in which social network the "who is who" is on but if there is one social network that this change hasn't affected and won't affect, it's the 10th planet called Twitter with it's endless drama.
A big thanks to Amaka for taking her time to create this post. You could connect to us via Twitter.
Amaka's handle is @hundeyin1
Debra's handle is @debra_olamide
Is there something missing in the above points about this twitter drama and all? . Let me have your thoughts in the comment box.